He left......

Every time when I saw his face and smile, I didn't even imagine that there would come a day when he would leave me and go. For me it was something which I considered as unbearable and unfathomable. Maybe because I was never ready to accept the reality. That reality which scattered and shattered my life.
We think we have so many tomorrow's coming our way, but the real thing is our present is a big question mark. 
We may have so many unsaid words to say.
We may have so many dreams to live.
We may have so many relations to cherish.
We may have so many regrets to live with.
We may have so many many things to do.
But we don't have the so called tomorrow which we keep waiting for!

They say," He left and one day we all too will live this world." They are completely right in some sense.
 But, how do I accept that he is gone? 
How do I accept that he couldn't fulfill his promise of coming back?
How do I accept that I would never be able to live under his shade?
How do I accept that I would never be able to share my joys and sorrows?
For them he left, but for me - 'He left and took a part of me with him'. 

Sometimes I feel like crying but the grief has overtook all my senses. I feel like I have no strength to bear, no tears to cry and no one to lean on. I don't even know what exactly I am feeling and which world I am living. I feel like this world is a delusion. Its empty and I my life is just still. Its stuck on to that time where my father bid me bye and promised to come back to me. I wish I could hold onto that time and never allowed him to go. This void and the emptiness would never be filled. The last time when he saw me, I could read those eyes which said," if ever I go, how would you live without me?" And I never had or will have answer to that question.

It may take a lot of time for me to accept that he is gone to never come back again. I cannot see his clothes, I cannot see his shoes, I cannot see his phone number, I cannot see those photographs, I cannot live without him! I feel like a part of me is dead.

He left....to never come back again and I left with him to never shine back again! 

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